After I Do

I have now read 3 books (one was a short story) by Taylor Jenkins Reid and I love her. They have all been different but have some similarities. They have all been about relationships in some way, shape, or form.

After I Do was obviously about a married couple who met young and got married after college. It was a little boring to me and probably my least favorite of the 3 I’ve read by Reid, but it was interesting to read being a [semi] newlywed. A year and a half isn’t truly still newlywed, right?

Lauren and Ryan hit a big rut in their marriage and are not communicating, not interacting, and resenting each other. So they decide to take a year off. He moves out, she stays in the house and keeps the dog. It is understandably tortuous, but they hold out. Life continues. Lauren’s life – which the book focuses on – has it’s own challenges apart from her marriage problems. Now, I don’t how realistic or common this is – to take a year off with no communication and no counseling. It seems a little far-fetched to me but it also takes place in Los Angles, so maybe it’s a thing there. I can’t imagine doing something like this, even if things are rocky in your marriage.

I won’t give away the end because that’s the whole story – do they get back together and work things out?! But overall the story has a great message about the importance of communication in a relationship and the importance of working for your marriage. It was also a very quick read and was free through Kindle unlimited (thanks 3 month trial)!

Love and Respect

We love our small group through Buckhead Church and believe in the importance of community. It’s especially great to have other newly married couples in our lives as well as leaders who have been in our shoes. In the year and a half that we’ve been together, we’ve done various studies and books and we just finished Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs.

Most of group had heard of this book and some had it already but hadn’t read it. My husband and I had never heard of it (though I was corrected by my sister-in-law that she told me about it 5 years ago – but I wasn’t married 5 years ago so that apparently went in one ear and out the other).

Overall, we enjoyed the book. The gist is that women crave love, while men crave respect. Obviously it’s never as black and white as it seems, but overall we agree with the book. Dr. Eggerichs goes through the ways that how, as husbands and wives, we do not show love or respect for our spouse, as well as ways to show love and respect to your spouse. I know when I put it this simply it seems very easy. But the book brought up ideas that I had never thought about before and it brought out some great conversation both within our group as well as between my husband and I.

I will say that there were times when the suggestions or topics felt a little out-dated. But again, overall the message was one that was good, that applied to our relationship within our marriage, and that we learned from.

A Sixpence in Her Shoe

Not many people know the full version of the traditional English wedding rhyme:

Something Old,

Something New,

Something Borrowed,

Something Blue,

And a sixpence in her shoe.

If you’ve never heard the first four lines, you’ve been living under a rock. But I had never heard the last line. Until my wedding day. My mom surprised me with a sixpence that has been worn by her, her two friends, and my sister-in-law on their wedding days.

The more traditional items in the first four lines are thought to bring good luck to the bride and groom, while the sixpence is thought to bring good fortune and wealth. My something old was my diamond pendant necklace that was my grandmother’s; something new was my dress and shoes; something borrowed was my friend’s (and bridesmaid) veil; something blue was my toenail polish and my unmentionables. 😀

A year into marriage and I cannot really speak to any of those things. I don’t think a marriage can use luck or wealth – moreso hard work and finding the right person. We are very fortunate in life in general and are thankful for everything we have.

But I thought this was a fun little tradition for the wedding that every bride can do, and having the complete package made it even better! We taped the coin into the arch of my shoe. I didn’t even know it was there – though I was terrified of it falling out. But it did not and it was returned safely to my mom. Thanks for the fun tradition!

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